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Debbie’s Story: “Joining Stitch is Like Water In The Desert”


Debbie Hartzell from Alpharetta, Georgia, has been a Stitch member for 5 months. In that time she’s attended Stitch events, organized a lot of activities and had a huge amount of fun creating enjoyment for the people in her community. She shares her Stitch journey to friendship and connection.

Debbie's Story

“I have been wanting to put down in words my recent experiences with the Stitch community. I cannot say enough good things about the experiences I have had, but I feel I need to give some actual examples to make the journey relatable.

A Crossroads

About a year ago, I realized I was at a crossroads. I had been caring for my mom and used most of my spare time making sure she had what she needed. When she passed away, I realized I had let most of my contacts get neglected. My family was no longer visiting to see my mom. I was adrift and I didn’t know it.

I started looking at ways to meet new people. The task seemed overwhelming. I live in Atlanta. This is not a huge city, but it is big enough. The idea of trying to create a new friend group at my age (69) was daunting. I retreated to my TV and signed up for a few more streaming services.

Trying New Things

 I started to venture out to various places, where I met some friendly people. I joined a meetup group. I did some work for my political party. I joined a dating service. I went to the gym. I started to reconnect with some of my dropped contacts.

Each thing was somewhat successful, but I still did not have a stable group I could turn to to find people who wanted to do things I was interested in. The dating scene was particularly dreary. I couldn’t envision depending on it for companionship.

Along Came Stitch

Wholly by accident, I saw an ad for Stitch. I had never heard of the group before, but something made me go to their website.

I signed up the first day.

A person from Stitch who lived in my area reached out and welcomed me. It was like being given water in the desert, as I had just come from a different site where no one reached out and real conversations were non-existent.

This person gave me some tips on how to navigate the Stitch site and how to sign up for things. I did it all wrong at first and still managed to attend an event. Looking at the upcoming events, I was surprised by how many things I could do. None were complicated, meet for coffee, go to the local farmers market, attend a free concert.

All these things got me off the couch and out of the house. I love to dress up, and this gave me ample opportunities to do that even if the events turned out to be terrible.

The First Stitch Event

I went to the first event, not knowing what to expect. It was a simple lunch at a local restaurant. The Stitch event organizer had her signature red Stitch hat on. I walked into the restaurant and sat down with 4 strangers.

Everyone I met at the first event was social and welcoming. We started to talk about jobs and other aspects of daily life. The food was delicious, and the time passed quickly. We found some commonalities and made connections.

I went home and signed up for a few more events. My organizer was sponsoring most of them, and I started to get to know her better. When I told her I grew up in a small town in the North, she mentioned her sister worked in that town. I was shocked, statistically, that seemed impossible. I am talking about a tiny town. Somehow, it was true. My organizer had even been to the town.

This was the first of many “six degrees of separation” type coincidences I ran into at different Stitch events. I saw them happening around me as well as to me.

I don’t want to make this too long, but I continued to attend events. It was easy. I met nice people. I got out of the house. I got to wear some fun outfits.

Becoming a Host

I decided to try to host my own event. That was its own learning curve, but not difficult to do. I found out a few things about scheduling and working with the venue I chose for the event.

Most importantly, I was making friends at the different events I attended. Some of these people hosted their own events, and I went to those. I made some friends I felt comfortable contacting for things outside of Stitch.

A Community is Born

Lo and behold, I had a social life!!! I thought it would take a year, but I would say after 3 months of Stitch events, I had a community.

I found I really enjoyed hosting events, and I started to get better at that. I got busier and had to choose what I wanted to do on the weekend. My siblings asked me about what I was doing, as they didn’t always have a group to “hang with,” and they were intrigued.

I could elaborate here on my different experiences, but I think I want to convey that you do not need to spend your time alone if you do not want to do that. There are lots and lots of genuinely nice people who are also trying to get out and meet people. In short order, you can “fill your dance card,” as my friend says, and get off the couch.

As I write this, I realize I could say a lot more, but my main message would be, TRY IT. You may be surprised by how many great people live and work in your area, people who are like you looking for a community.”

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